Venus with husband Ken in 2008

Early years in Abadan

Abadan in the south western tip of Iran is one of the hottest and most humid towns and is home to the country’s largest oil refinery, becoming an upcoming and prosperous new town in the late 1950s due to the development of the oil and petrochemical industries.

My mother Ruhi Darakhshani had moved there from Tehran, the capital city, in the 1950s to work for the oil company, and my father, from a farming family in Masjid Solayman, had also moved to Abadan to work in the export/import sector.

My mother was a Bahá’í and interested in equality, inclusivity, rights of women and all aspects of social justice. My father had rejected Islam due to dogmatic and superstitious beliefs and was keen on political change with some interest in Bahá’í- based solutions.

Somehow these interests got them together in 1956 and I was born in August 1958 in Abadan during the peak season of heat and humidity. Fortunately I survived and grew up in good health.

My mother had to go back to work after a short maternity leave as our house was linked to her work for the oil company, so I had a nanny. This did not diminish my mother’s love and attention for us children. 

Thinking about my childhood in Abadan, I seem to have had the most idyllic one, though may not have appreciated it at the time. I attended a good nursery, primary and secondary school, and attended many after school activities, including music, art, ballet, and guides.

My mother also had many interests apart from her work, including writing articles for the local press, writing and producing the children’s programme for the local radio and also presenting for the local television network. I got involved in those and every Thursday evening we would record the children’s programme to be aired the following day. I was the young story teller on the programme!

Early memories of Fridays (equivalent to Sundays) are of my father taking my sister and me to the local Taj cinema to watch a children’s movie. It was good to spend time with him as his work was more time-consuming. Then one Friday I was told that I was to go to a Dars Akhlagh (children’s class). I remember being excited but also a little apprehensive about going, but happy once I got there, as there were other children, and a lovely elegant lady as our teacher!

I must have been 6 years old then and that must have been my first involvement in the Bahá’í community. The classes continued for many years and led to many strong and lasting friendships with amazing young people and their families in Abadan. There is a very research-based curriculum for those classes, including learning about the history and teachings of the Faith. I remember Mrs. Solhjo and Mrs. Doostdar as two of my junior youth teachers and also speech-making classes, most instrumental in my spiritual growth as a young teenager.

Back home we were a very social family, as are many Persians! Our friends, mostly my parents’ colleagues, local artists, poets and writers, were from many walks of life, with diverse views and beliefs. In Iran in the 1960s, many people were mostly against religion and their views and words were not complimentary about any of the major religions.

Story of my maternal grandfather

My mother’s father was one of the prominent Jewish merchants of Hamadan. In the 1920s he had become a Bahá’í after studying the Book of Certitude, much to the opposition of his large Jewish family. However, one of his brothers and one sister had also become Bahá’ís. My grandfather’s first five children also became Bahá’ís and have remained in the Faith. Their children and grandchildren are now serving the Faith in Iran and in many parts of the world.

My mother was one of the youngest children of the next 7 siblings. By then life was difficult and the family had to move to Tehran after my grandfather passed away. My mother moved to Abadan where most of the family and friends were not Bahá’ís.

Learning to make sense of the world

Being a little worldly wiser than one of my age, I was always interested in affairs of the world and adult conversations. With both parents interested in social justice but having different routes and solutions, I was also very aware of the need to make the world a better place, but how? Was it a political solution or a spiritual one? What was religion about – superstition or reason and rationality?

We had a comfortable life in Abadan. Although we lived in a very small house, we were happy and enjoyed the many clubs and facilities, thanks to the oil company. But I was acutely aware of the immense inequality in our little city. There was the poor Arab quarter with much poverty and deprivation and then there were the rich neighborhoods with huge houses, lush gardens and air conditioning. As a young teenager I knew this was unfair and together with a group of my friends, we planned to do something about it when we got older. I was so vocal about such visible and extreme inequality that one day my social studies teacher said I might get into trouble if talked too much about it!

Spiritual Solution

The children’s classes and then junior youth classes provided the spiritual solution to these problems. I was also part of a group of young people who saw the world as their family and were learning to share Bahá’u’lláh’s teachings as the supreme remedy for the ills of our communities and neighborhoods. At the age of 13 I was invited to serve on the local junior youth committee, organising events and gatherings for young people. That was a wonderful experience, learning about the joy of service and being part of our amazing Bahá’í administrative system. It was great fun too, being accompanied by so many wonderful young friends.

At the age of 15, I decided to be part of this spiritual and effective solution and jumped in with both feet!  Having signed my Bahá’í declaration card, I received a beautiful letter and a book from the Spiritual Assembly of Abadan to welcome me to the Bahá’í community. It was one of the most joyous and exciting phases of my life. This was complemented with attending youth summer schools in Tehran, getting to know Bahá’í youth and seekers from many parts of Iran, learning from amazing talks and presentations.

Seeds of Pioneering

It was one of the talks given by Mr Afshin that really excited me about the joys of pioneering and the importance of sharing the beautiful teachings with others as a gift of love and friendship towards them.

About that time, my mother was also thinking about pioneering to another country, so in 1974, as she had retired early from the oil company, we travelled to London in order to pioneer to wherever we could serve. After a few days we were invited to consult with the Pioneering Committee at the National Office. One of the members, Viv Bartlett, suggested Brecon as a possible pioneering option! Well, why not. The spirit of adventure and service was alive in us all!

South Wales

So we moved to Brecon to support dear Hilda Black and her son Nigel. An exciting few years followed. The local secondary school was surprised to have a pupil keen on maths! The locals were surprised to have kindly new friends who brought a lot of fruit and vegetables and had lots of days of celebration, especially Bahá’í Holy Days, inviting their new friends and neighbours to share Persian cuisine and learn about the Faith!

We made many friends and many seekers came along. The community grew with the support of more pioneers and declarations and eventually an LSA was formed.

After two years of school, I moved to Newport to attend the local college for my A-Levels. That was another year of much excitement and learning from my wonderful foster family, Viv and Rita Bartlett and their daughters Fleur and Leila. Their house was filled with beautiful music, prayers, and many seekers and enquirers, with regular deepenings and firesides. 

Again I made some wonderful friends at college. Two joined the Faith and we kept in touch for some time.

The North East

For some reason, still unclear to me, I applied and was accepted at Newcastle University to study BSc Geophysics, thus the next exciting chapter started! I moved to Newcastle as a student and received a very warm welcome from the Bahá’í community, John and Kathleen Coates in particular.

There was a very active Bahá’í society at the university, with enthusiastic members and new seekers regularly attending our weekly talks and firesides. After a year, my mother decided to move up north to help form the Spiritual Assembly of Tynedale, so we became pioneers once again in that beautiful goal district. They were really exciting times as our local teaching group visited towns and villages and shared the wonderful teachings with the many who longed to hear them.

A couple of years later, with the help of more pioneers and declarations, the new Spiritual Assembly was formed.  Being 21 then, I had the bounty of serving on the Assembly.

North East of Scotland

I graduated and it was time for the next adventure, a Masters course in Aberdeen. Not a pioneering move but I had a very warm welcome from the community, Alma Donald especially, and joined another active University Bahá’í society. Again we had a small teaching group with regular firesides and unity feasts for seekers and enquirers. It was another exciting time. I recently found letters from one of those seekers saying how much he had enjoyed learning about the Faith, having been to our Bahá’í Society stall at the Fresher’s Fair and taken books and literature.

By August 1981 my course was coming to an end and I was eager to be an adult and apply for a job!  At the time, Persian scientists and oil explorers were not really employable in the UK. My landlady suggested teaching. I was not brave enough to apply for teaching in a secondary school so she showed me an advert for a job at Inverness College! No harm in applying, though with no teaching experience, no teaching qualification and younger than many of my prospective students, very unlikely even to get an interview!

While in the midst of these plans, I had a phone call from Christine Beer on behalf of the Travel Teaching committee, inviting me to join a teaching project in Shetland! 

Shetland adventures – and a very significant one too!

I purchased my cheap air ticket and set off for Lerwick. There I was collected by another member of the teaching group, Ken Carew, and taken to a Bahá’í feast in Lerwick where I met the other members, including our local hostess Audrey McKay (now Bennett). It was the most amazing two weeks with most wonderful co-workers. We visited several of the smaller islands, which included Yell, Fetlar and Unst, inviting locals to come to an exhibition about the Faith and watch the documentary film The Green Light Expedition. Along the way we met lots of beautiful souls, some seekers and some who later joined the Faith. Also we had the opportunity to get to know the rest of the teaching team which included Zoe Turner, Viv Craig and Ken Carew. At that time, Ken was working in North Wales and had become a Bahá’í a couple of years earlier. He was eager to move to Scotland and was keenly applying for jobs. After our two glorious weeks (spiritually and weather-wise), we all had to head back to our communities, promising to keep in touch. I went back to Aberdeen, received an invitation for an interview in Inverness, and Ken was offered an interview for a job in Aberdeen.

In September 1981 I started work as a maths and science lecturer at Inverness College and moved to another amazing, friendly, helpful and welcoming Bahá’í community. It was considered a pioneering move as it relieved Betty Reed (a Continental Counsellor at the time) of serving on the Spiritual Assembly.

Ken also was offered a job in Aberdeenshire and moved to Scotland. We started corresponding, and eventually decided to get married!

Ken Carew

Ken was the middle child of Welsh parents who were living and working in London. The family was interested in aspects of Christianity and spiritualism. His elder brother had become a church of England rector and his younger brother joined a Hindu group.

After working as an engineer for the National Health Service, Ken went to work in Canada, but after two years and some personal challenges, came back and went to live with his parents who had by then retired to Pembrokeshire. About that time the local Bahá’í community had advertised classes in comparative religion and Mr. Carew senior decided it was a good learning opportunity for Ken and himself.

There seems to have been little mention of the Bahá’í faith in those classes, but the Bahá’í community, which included Denver Morgan, Lou Turner and many others, was very friendly and welcoming and shared many prayers with the participants. Ken found the Tablet of Ahmad especially effective (as we are promised) and together with the teachings of the Faith about love, unity and a peaceful future, as a remedy for himself and others. Ken joined the Faith at the end of 1979 though sadly by then his father was quite ill, but he encouraged Ken to join the Faith as he also felt the truth and beauty of the teachings.

Inverness and the Highlands

After our marriage in April 1982, we settled in Inverness, both working and serving on the Local Spiritual Assembly with some many wonderful coworkers such as Tom and Ann Mackenzie. We made many friends, held firesides and unity feasts and also enjoyed visiting friends in isolated areas of the Highlands and islands.

Just before the arrival of our first child, we decided to pioneer again. The only practical option was Nairn (which was a goal area) so we moved 15 miles to the west of Inverness, which allowed Ken to keep his job, and for access to local facilities.

We were delighted to welcome our daughter Carmelia in June 1984 and our son Naysun in April 1986. I joined lots of groups and activities in Nairn and made many good friends. We were also able to hold lots of firesides and gatherings in our home. Such a blessing.

Ayrshire

Ken’s company decided to close but with a toddler and a baby, it was time for him to look for another job. We were so sad to leave the Highlands and our wonderful Bahá’í family and friends. In moving to Darvel, Ayrshire, we found another welcoming Bahá’í family and new friends, including the Thomson and the Bayat families.

Ken started working in Hamilton and I did some local tutoring in Kilmarnock.

We welcomed our son Justin in 1988 and that led to new friends and seekers.

However, after two years Ken’s company closed again and he had to look for another job, so it was time for the next adventure.

South West Scotland

In 1990 we had a warm welcome from our Bahá’í family in Dumfries for our move there. Possibly another pioneering adventure, as it relieved dear Jackie Mehrabi who was an Auxiliary Board member, from serving on the LSA. Yet again we found a wonderful Bahá’í family and many loving new friends.

I started teaching at the local college and Ken worked as a software engineer with the local council and then the local police force.

Having three children at nursery and at school was a perfect way of meeting lots of lovely people, making friends and becoming involved in the life of the community (Bahá’í and local).

Both Jackie and Sarah Lindsay ran children’s classes and truly fed the hearts and minds of our three children with their love for Baha’u’llah and of the Faith.   

Sometime earlier, Jackie and a few other friends ran a local peacemaker club in one of the local neighbourhoods. This was the precursor of the children’s classes and junior youth groups. It attracted many young people and the local council also showed an interest. Encouraged by this and a few other community initiatives, the children invited their school friends to our own peacemaker club, originally held in the local library and then in our home for a number of years. Our children were also able to attend the regular youth gatherings in Scotland, initiated by the Board members, as well as regular summer and winter schools and now with own families serving their communities in Scotland.

Some family events

As a family we attended many summer and winter schools, national convention, and gatherings, mostly around Scotland. In 2000 we were invited to be the Bahá’í family in the Family zone of the Millennium Dome! A very exciting honour for us with a free trip and visit to the Dome!

Family photo for the Millennium Dome in 2000

The banner at the Millennium Dome

In 2004, we had the bounty of a family pilgrimage to the Holy Land. This was a spiritual journey and a confirmation of faith for us all, specially our teenage children.

In 2019 I had the honour of meeting the Queen at a reception for community volunteers held at Buckingham Palace. I was invited there for work in the interfaith and spiritual education of young people (children’s peacemaker club). 

Counting our blessings

No more pioneering adventures any more for Ken and myself, but over the many years of living and working in Dumfries we have been blessed with opportunities for service in so many ways. Some of the local community activities include: parent groups, interfaith activities, local multicultural association, diversity group, community renewal group, peaceful parenting group, environmental and conservation groups and many more.

Venus and Ken in Gibraltar, 2012

Over the last few years, with new guidance from the Universal House of Justice and wonderful learning from Bahá’í communities around the world about the ‘instrument of limitless potentialities’, we have been inviting friends and seekers and those who long to serve their communities, to join us in learning about raising the capacity of individuals and empowering communities. As more friends from many walks of life, especially those new to the Faith, join this endeavour, we are gaining ‘an ever more profound understanding of Baha’u’llah’s teachings – the sovereign remedy for every disease’ – and are learning to apply them to the local and wider society’ (Message from the Universal House of Justice – 30 December 2021) 

Our children

Carmelia and her husband Aaron are both serving as members of the Spiritual Assembly in Newton Mearns (near Glasgow). Aaron also serves as a Junior Youth animator and Carmelia supports the Bahá’í-inspired toddler group. Naysun and his wife Charlotte run a media company in Glasgow. They host Feasts and Holy Day gatherings in their home (before the pandemic) and support local activities. Justin and his wife Shoko live in Glasgow. Shoko, with support from Justin, runs the Bahá’í-inspired toddler group, with many attendees, and also serves on the Spiritual Assembly of Glasgow.

In summary, my life is filled with encountering amazing, wonderful souls and I am so blessed to have crossed paths with them all in my travels and adventures.

I am especially grateful to my maternal grandfather, who sadly I never met, for recognizing the Truth while reading the Book of Certitude, to my father-in-law, who again sadly I never met, for encouraging Ken to attend the Bahá’í meetings and to join the Faith, to my parents for nurturing my quest for peace, equality and social justice, to Ken for his love, reliance on prayer and many years of marriage, to my children and their families for their love of the Faith, to the loving guidance of the institutions of the Faith, local, regional, national and international, giving us constant encouragement in our community building endeavours, and to the Bahá’í community of Scotland for their love, welcome and friendship ever since I moved to Scotland over 40 years ago!

Thank you all for being part of a rich and exciting life.

____________________________

Venus Alae-Carew

Dumfries, January 2022

The Carew family in 2005

Venus passed away on 25 January 2023.